Summoned By Jesus

Heb 11:6 But without faith it is impossible to please Him: for he that cometh to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him.

The “call” and message are intertwined. It began when my wife, Renee, had a seizure and was rushed to the hospital. She had a malignant brain tumor. Emergency surgery was scheduled 4 days later. During those 4 days, while on anti-seizure medications, she felt and acted normal. She was on the 5th floor of the hospital…the floor dedicated to those with brain injuries and medical issues. Because of Covid, I was not allowed to see her. She would walk the floor praying for the many who were in pain or great discomfort.

We spoke frequently by phone. She told me the Lord was crafting a “word” in her about the “fellowship of His sufferings” Phil 3:10. She said it was a strong word for the church, the American church, and would shake up a lot of people’s theology.

Though the operation was successful, she suffered another, more severe seizure while in rehab. She would not come home for 30 days. At one point she was very near death. But she progressed and came home to recover. Radiation and out-patient rehab were scheduled.

During this time (hospitalization and recovery) the Lord began speaking to me about “men”. Which was an irritation since I was praying for and caring for my wife. I did not know it then, but her “word” and the Lord’s promptings in me, were connected.

But two months from her initial hospitalization, Renee’s condition began to decline. During her last 60 days she would say “I just want to go be with Jesus.” She would go home to the Lord four and a half months after her initial seizure.

The loss was so great. She was loved by so many. Especially her family. Her kids and grandkids all came while she was under hospice care and before she passed. The Lord made a way for her to share deeply and lovingly with each one. And I was with her as she took her last breath.

Testimonies at her memorial service were many…from many ages and many walks of life. My quiet, soft-spoken wife had made an impact on and in the lives of many, many people…because she carried, shared and embodied the Love of Christ. The epitaph on her gravestone reads: She Loved Unconditionally.

During the following year of grief, the Holy Spirit would speak to me several times, knitting together her “word” and the message He has for men. (The Lord works in mysterious ways…)

The Lord prompted me to examine holiness. I was reading seven books at the same time…all pointing to the same thing…holiness, purity, sanctification. His word says: Heb 12:14 “Follow peace with all men, and HOLINESS, without which no man shall see the Lord.”

It began to occur to me that holiness and “the fellowship of His sufferings” were essentially the same. They both relate to Lordship. Submission. Consecration. Christ-likeness.

The Holy Spirit began to speak to me. Short messages. Months apart, but connected:

* She had to go (be with Jesus) so I could grow.

* “GO” (I know not where.)

* “I didn’t make covenants with women.”

(This last message seems controversial and combative. It is not.)

More to come….